Dear Leonardo
by pathtodecay
Summary: Ezio is falling for Leonardo hard and fast, and doesn't know how to deal with it. I may need a proof-reader, apply within, thanks.
1. Chapter 1

"Dear Leonardo,"

No, too personal.

"To Leonardo da Vinci,"

Wrong again, far too cold and formal. It had to sound appropriately distant, yet approachable.

"To the loveliest, most wonderful artist in all the word, secret love of mine, Leonardo da Vinci,"

As much as he would like to leave that… No.

This was getting ridiculous. He had met the man once, just once, and yet he was consumed with infatuation. One glance is enough to set the heart aflutter they say. Well, whoever "they" are, they're right.

Ezio needed to get his feelings out somehow. Writing them down had always helped, even if he never gave the letters he wrote to who they were about, just taking the thoughts from his head and putting them down set him at rest somehow.

This wasn't the first time he had fallen for another male, and he had come to terms with being attracted to men and women years ago, but there was just something special about this one, something stopping him from thinking straight.

He needed a rest. He got up from his desk and dropped onto the bed. Maybe after a rest he would forget all about this.

"Ezio! Svegliare, my boy. I need you to run an errand for me!"

It was his mother, and it was morning. No doubt she needed him to deliver some unimportant letter or carry more boxes from ebulliently handsome artists' homes to their own. All he wanted to do was sleep…

"Ezio! I won't call you again, now get down here!"

"All right, all right. I'm coming!" He got up. He hadn't changed to go to sleep, so he figured it wouldn't matter if he didn't now.

The morning light was already beaming into every room in the house. He could hear Claudia outside in the courtyard gossiping with her friends and Petruccio playing games with his. Mother was sitting in her favourite chair, reading a book.

"Ezio I need you to take one of the paintings back to Leonardo. I think he gave it to us by mistake, or at least I didn't ask for it. Go straighten it out for me will you?"

What was this? A chance to go see him again? Surely this must be some sign, a touch of fate or something along those lines. Ezio was nervous.

"But why can't you go? Father might be needing me to help and I need to be here just in case."

"Your father is not here. He is visiting Lorenzo de Medici on some matter, and I'm just feeling too tired today. Please be a good boy and just take the painting back, it's in a box on the table."

He said no more on the matter, but bowed curtly, grabbed to box and left the room and building.

Firenze was buzzing with life; everyone was awake and busy despite it being the weekend. The art merchant and dottore outside of the Palazzo Auditore were as busy as to be expected, with the doctor attracting far more trade than the trader opposite. A recent outbreak in syphilis in the San Marco district had done wonders for the medical business in the area since those affected preferred to seek help outside of where they would most likely be recognised. The number of bards in the city had decreased sharply after a trend of writing bawdy songs involving members of the Signoria had resulted in the sudden quiet creation of a new law outlawing such music, with the punishment being the destruction of any musical instruments in possession of the performer, and a lifelong ban from any public musical spectacle. Due to its secret nature the law had caught out an impressive number of bards, increasing the amount of beggars but also increasing public morale who were pleased beyond measure not to be strummed at melodramatically each time they entered a public square. Ezio made a half-hearted attempt to stall for time by climbing onto a rooftop one-handed to find feathers for Petruccio, but not a single one was to be seen.

"Ezio Auditore! As much as it is a pleasure to see you again, would you satisfy my curiosity as to why you are on my rooftop?"

Merda.


	2. Chapter 2

"I… I did not realise that this was yours as well as that roof." That was a stupid thing to say. This was quite obviously part of his home, considering this half of the building only looked different because it was taller.

"That's quite alright, I'm not scolding you or anything, it's just a rather peculiar spectacle to see someone climbing a building like that. Impressive too." Wow, he had impressed him. Ezio felt his heart lift and a smile sneak onto his face. It was lucky he was so far away from Leonardo else he might have noticed something was up. "Why don't you come down and save yourself from straining your voice shouting down?"

He climbed down the more careful way, onto the smaller roof and creeping down the window panes. As impressive as he wanted to be, a broken leg would have sent him right back home without leaving for some time. And all of this was twice as difficult trying to juggle a small box

Leonardo's studio looked more like a workshop than a typical artist's room, at least as far as Ezio knew most artists didn't have little figurines and models made of wood & clay. There were so many interesting things to take in, and all of it looked so well made, or drawn, or painted.

"So Ezio, what brings you back to my humble abode? Did your mother have a problem with any of the pictures?"

"What? Err…" Damn, his mind had decided to stop working. He looked down and noticed the box still in his hands. "Oh, yes, I'm here about this!" He thrust it in Leonardo's direction. That was a bit silly, now he looks like someone completely inept at explaining anything coherently.

"The box? I believe that was you mothers, or at least not mine."

"No, no, no. Inside the box. A painting. Not hers. I mean, you gave it to us by accident."

"Really? Well that would make more sense, let me see… " He took the box, his hand grazing Ezio's for but a second making the Auditore's cheeks redden noticeably and his stomach to fill with butterflies. Leonardo opened the box and sighed. "Ah, yes. This was an accident – a painting for another client. They picked theirs up yesterday also; no doubt they shall be sending a rude servant over to pick it up. But no matter, thank you for returning this quickly." He smiled in Ezio's direction, the blushing increased still further.

"You know, if you wait I suppose. I mean I'd be happy to, ahh, deliver the painting for you? You know, if you… want me to?"

"Really? Are you not busy, did your mother not say you work with your father, surely banking work takes up a lot of time?" He looked genuinely interested. Any time he asked a question he looked like he looked like he actually cared about the answer. It made Ezio even more nervous, as if saying the wrong thing would make Leonardo sad. He didn't think he ever wanted to see Leonardo sad.

"No, not really. To tell you the truth I only really do courier work anyway. Delivering letters here and there, so it'd be no problem. None at all."

"Well, if you don't mind. This painting was for the Gonfaloniere. His home is not too far from here, it's just..."

"I think I know where it is. Messer Alberti is a good friend of my fathers. I'll be back as quickly as possible.

"Grazie Ezio, this will save me from any awkward apologies…"

"Nessun problema, I'm happy to help you." The 'you' at the end of the sentence personalised it enough without letting on the truth. He had no idea whether Leonardo was the same as him, and even if he was that didn't mean he _felt_ the same.

He had to tread carefully.


	3. Chapter 3

"Your eyes are the most beautiful shade of hazel…"

Leonardo giggled a little. "You said that earlier."

"I know, but it's all I can think about when I look into them."

"Well why don't you stop thinking, come over here and go back to sleep."

Ezio obeyed, and as he held his love close to his chest he felt his eyes grow heavier until he could no longer keep them open.

Ezio woke up. It was just a dream. His heart sunk. Leonardo hadn't been there when he got back, but he had left a note pinned to the door.

"Ezio,

Thank you for delivering that painting for me. Unfortunately I got a message notifying me that a close friend is quite ill. He's stuck at home alone so I'm going to run some errands for him. If you wait until I return I'll pay you for the trouble, or if you are busy please come round tomorrow.

Thanks again,

Leonardo."

He had kept the note, partly so he could pretend it had blown off and not go to see him and partly just as a keepsake, to have something of his.

It was still dark outside, with the sky slightly purple hinting at the soon rising sun. As beautiful as Firenze always was, he much preferred it in the Midday sun, at this time it was easy to feel alone when the streets were empty.

The streets were completely empty. Nobody around to see anything you did. This gave Ezio an idea, he would be able to reply to the note without having to actually look to him, or talk to him, or stare down those hazel tunnels that consumed his thoughts.

He took to his desk to write a note, but stopped. He hadn't been able to do this last time, how was he supposed to do it now? He supposed it might be best to just dive into it. He took a deep breath, emptied his thoughts and started writing.

"Dear Leonardo,

Sorry for not waiting around for you, but I couldn't. I'm not going to lie to you why, I've been lying a lot lately and I don't want to hide things from you. That is why I'm writing this note. I'm also afraid of the consequences, which is why I'm delivering it when I can be sure you won't receive it right away."

He stopped and stared down at the paper. It was difficult to know where to go from here, how to introduce what it is that he really wanted to say.

"The truth is that I think I'm starting to fall for you."

To see it written it down there seemed to confirm what he felt whilst at the same time making him want to crawl into bed and never leave. If he stopped now this would all go away.

He knew that this was nothing but a self-comforting lie. He had to keep going.

"I know this may come as a shock to you. You probably thought I like girls, and this is true. But if I'm completely honest I have never felt this strongly about any girl I've ever met. Every time I'm with you I can't think straight. (There's a joke in there somewhere, I hope you like irony.) Just looking in your eyes, staring at your handsome face makes my heart leap. There's every chance that everything I've just written is making your skin crawl, an I suppose I understand if you never want to even be near me again. I just had to tell you the truth. I want to love you, and I desperately want you to love me, but that probably won't ever happen.

That's all I wanted to say.

Ezio."

He re-read the letter a few times. It wasn't anywhere near perfect, but it would have to do. He got dressed, climbed out of the window and onto the roof. The run to Leonardo's home took just a minute this way so nobody could possibly notice that he wasn't where he should be. When he arrived the lights weren't on and there was no sign of life. He climbed down and without breathing he took the letter from the inside of his coat and slipped it underneath the doorway for Leonardo to find in the morning.

The walk on the ground back to the Palazzo Auditore was quite pleasant; a warm breeze was flowing down the street and it was just light enough to see down the next street. Something told him he'd be able to sleep a little better tonight. Even if things didn't turn out just as he wanted, at least he knew he'd tried..


	4. Chapter 4

Ezio got but 5 hours sleep that night before he was awoken by a familiar sound.

"Ezio! Time to get up; there is a letter for you!"

A letter? Oh no, not a letter. For a blissful second he had forgotten all about last night and now his contentment gave way to dread at what was to come. Surely no good could come from this. He got out of bed slowly, trying to come to terms with the fact that in a few short minutes he would know whether he would have what he longed for, or whether all was lost. He thought back to the events of yesterday and felt nothing short of stupid. He had severed all ties with Cristina, a girl who had been nought but good to him, and in the most idiotic way possible. Surely that could have been avoided. Maybe another letter could solve that, but first he would find out from this venture whether this form of communication was lucky for him.

There were two pigeons outside of his window. They were all different shades of grey, but only grey. This seemed peculiar since most pigeons at least have some different colouring around their neck. They were flowing in the air, intertwining as they flew. It was almost like he was watching in slow motion. He wasn't dying, nothing grave or terrible had happened, and yet the very ground beneath his feet seemed to have changed.

Ezio got up and began to dress. He chose to wear robes in grey, it seemed like an appropriate colour: calm, understated, fragilely toeing the line between light and dark. He related to the colour, it showed the hidden depths that nobody expected in a young Florentine man who fought all day and partied all night. Maybe he was sick of all that, maybe it wasn't what he had wanted from the beginning. It was expected of him to do so, to go out and make trouble with his friends. Right now he felt that he didn't have many friends, the only person he was very close to was Federico who was hardly ever there, always so busy with his band of misfits. Since they were children he looked up to his brother, superior in everything, superior in love. Federico taught Ezio how to approach those he was most attracted to, the very first of them being Cristina…

He couldn't bare to see what was written for him, if indeed it was from Leonardo. For all he knew all of this fretting could be for nothing and it could simply be some pointless message inviting him somewhere for something he didn't want to attend. As he left the room he tried to figure out what would bring more disappointment: a negative response, or no response at all.

The letter was sitting on the centre table of the main room in the house, written on expensive-looking parchment with an elegant-looking signature. It simply read "Ezio", without any of the formalities one would expect when usually addressed as 'Ezio Auditore da Firenze' in written form.

He took the paper and returned to his room without bothering to make an excuse, despite the fact that either way he would no doubt be confined to the space for a good amount of time. He closed the door sat on the floor, his back leaning on the door itself. His hands were trembling. He had expected to be sweating as one normally does when nervous, especially in the Summer time, but he felt colder than usually. The butterflies that he was fast beginning to associate with Leonardo were there once more. Closing his eyes, he opened the seal on the parchment and looked down with the logic being to rip the situation away as one would a bandage from the skin.

"Ezio,

I'm sorry. There is someone else. Please don't take this personally. I hope we can maybe become friends despite this. I hope you are not upset.

Leonardo."

Something inside burst like an explosion and all was silence. The parchment was thrown to one side and the grey on his sleeve turned black as it became wet.


	5. Chapter 5

It was still light outside, it snuck in through the shutters like a thief, mocking him as it stole away from his solitude with the noise of the city supporting its insulting glare. The rest of the Auditore family had all gone out on their separate errands, leaving Ezio alone to wallow in brazen self-pity. He wasn't angry at Leonardo, he had every right to love who he wanted even if that wasn't him. No, it was himself he was angry at. He had allowed himself to get caught up in this little dream that he could find love with someone he really wanted. Perhaps this was payback from the Gods above for so shamelessly doing something almost identical to Cristina. It seemed almost ironic that he had broken a heart only to have the same done to him. He was only guessing, of course. There was no telling if Cristina even felt an iota of longing for him, or whether she had just settled for someone she wouldn't stifle her.

Maybe that was his destiny: to be settled for. Leonardo knew he could do better, and took that option. Maybe there wasn't actually anyone else, just the knowledge that Ezio would be there if he couldn't find his ideal.

And he would be there. Because as hurt as he felt hours after reading that damned letter, nothing had changed. Only the fact that he knew for sure he was alone. He picked up the envelope and looked at where his name had been written. "Ezio." When he had seen it sitting on the table, all sealed and ready to be opened it had given him butterflies such as to make him feel lighter than air. The butterflies were dead now. Their lifeless corpses formed a weight in the pit of his stomach.

Ezio was being melodramatic. He barely knew Leonardo, why was he so upset? Why couldn't they be friends? After all, crushes come and go and so would this one. No doubt after a while the feelings would disappear and be replaced by some sort of camaraderie.

There was a knock downstairs at the door. Annetta answered. He heard muffled speech and made out no words because of the din from the daily throng outside; one of the unfortunate implications of living near the centre of a busy city. Someone was climbing the stairs towards Ezio's room, and there came the expected knock at his bedroom door.

"Messer Ezio, there is a man here to see you."

"I don't want to see anyone, tell him to go away."

"He was quite insistent that he wanted to see you."

"I don't care; I'm seeing no-one today. Tell him to come back some other day. Who is it anyway?"

"The artist your mother likes, Leonardo da Vinci."

"Well in that case I definitely don't want to see him. Tell him I'm out, tell him I'm ill. Tell him I've died for all I care. Just make him go away."

The last sentence had caused the tears to erupt from his eyes once more, as if he was having to physically push him away. To see him now would reopen a wound he was trying to seal. He heard Annetta leave the doorway; no doubt she had heard him sobbing. He didn't care. They say that only women and children cry, but Ezio had as much feeling in himself as anyone so why shouldn't he be allowed to release it?

After a few moments he heard the door shut and Annetta return to his door, "He is gone, I said you were ill in bed. He told me to ask you to visit him when you were feeling well. He also gave me something for you. May I come in or should I leave it here for you to retrieve?"

"Just leave it on the floor where I won't stand on it. I'll get it in a minute." He heard her place whatever it was down and return down the stairs. Ezio got up from the floor, he felt sore from lying in the same place for so long and his clothes were all creased. He opened the door and looked down. Sitting there was a little carving made of wood. He picked it up to examine it. It appeared to be some sort of bird, like a dove or a… a pigeon.

Anger bubbled inside him. He wanted to break the little figurine, to throw it across the room and out of the window so Leonardo could see it smash into a thousand pieces on the cold stone ground. But he couldn't bring himself to. It was so small and delicately carved; it had to have taken forever to do. To break it would be like a monster crushing it's victims for nought but an expression of rage.

There was an inscription etched on the base. It said "Dispiace."

Ezio went over to his desk, took a piece of parchment and tore it into a smaller piece. He wrote a note on it and made a hole in one corner. He took a loose bit of thread from his shirt and threaded it through before tying it to the bird figure. He left his room, went down the stairs and left the house. He must have looked a mess but this didn't matter. He arrived at his destination quickly enough; Leonardo only lived a couple of streets away. He took a deep breath in and knocked on the door. He answered almost instantly.

"Ezio! I'm so glad to see you, please come in. I came to your house just a few minutes ago, but your maid said you were ill so I left. I must say that you do look rather pale, and your eyes are quite bloodshot. Are… are you sure you're okay?" His voice had began loud and excited, but faded as he took in Ezio's appearance.

Ezio said nothing. He simply took the carving from a pocket and handed to Leonardo before turning and walking back home.

Leonardo looked down at the little bird that he had made: a reconciliation present, something to show he didn't ever want to upset or displease the receiver, even though he could not be the lover he seemed to want. With the gift returned he feared that he had paid him some great insult, or had disregarded his feelings in his haste to make things better. He looked down and saw the little note attached around the bird's neck. He read it.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. My pain is my own.


	6. Chapter 6

_Apologies for taking so long between the previous chapter and this one. Sometimes things are just out of your control. I promise that I'll try to be quicker next time._

_I hope you enjoy this as much as I love writing it._

"Ezio! Come out here! We have to talk about this!"

"Go away. I don't have to talk about anything…"

"Please Ezio, I don't like standing here shouting at you like this!"

"Well then you know how to stop, don't you?"

"Please, just come down. I just want to talk to you."

Leonardo's voice had quietened on the last few words with a soft ring of sadness. Ezio could see himself in the mirror. He looked ridiculous; sitting by a window-ledge in the semi-darkness, on the floor with a self-pitying grimace stuck on his face. Perhaps he didn't look as silly as he thought, but he certainly felt it. The one time he tried to be really honest and open with someone…

"Ezio, come on! I'm not going away!"

He sighed. Leonardo hadn't actually done anything wrong, and yet Ezio still felt like he wanted to punish him, to make him feel as bad as he did. When this thought came into his head he felt a twinge of guilt. He didn't want to make Leonardo feel bad, not really.

"Ezio, why is Leonardo standing out there shouting up at you?"

It was mother.

"It's nothing mama, it's just a misunderstanding. About money. That's all."

She was looking down at him from the doorway with a sceptical frown. "Well could you at least go down there? It must be important in he wants to talk to you that badly. If it's not important to you, then it must at least be for him. Just be polite and give him some of your oh-so precious time won't you?"

He fixed her a defiant stare, but he couldn't win against her. After all, it wasn't his father that he had inherited his steely nerve from.

"Okay mama, for you." He got up from the floor and without saying any more went downstairs and out the door. Leonardo was sitting on a bench in the Auditore courtyard. To Ezio's eye he didn't look dishevelled or overtly upset. The only thing that could be giving away any kind of inner torment was the way he was slightly slumped over, his elbows resting on his thighs and his gaze directed downwards. He didn't even look up as Ezio closed the door behind him. No doubt Maria Auditore had been practising her investigative skills on him too.

Ezio didn't sit down beside him; instead he remained standing about a metre away. But even now all he wanted to do was hold him in his arms as Leonardo rested his head on his shoulder.

"So, you said you wanted to talk."

Leonardo looked first up at the window, and then at Ezio in one quick motion. It was a sign that he may not have actually expected him to come down from his hiding place. He stood up and faced towards Ezio, but didn't look at him.

"Yes, I think we should talk, I really do. But could we maybe go back to my workshop? It's just more private there. I want to be able to speak openly with you without worrying about people listening for petty gossip, and I want you to feel the same way."

"I'm not sure if I would feel happy about being open anywhere." He heard the steel in his own voice as he said these words; Leonardo looked down at the ground now. It was a sorry sight, and as cold as Ezio tried to seem, he was torn inside between the anguish of rejection and the longing for closeness. "But if it will make you feel better, then okay."

"Thank you. I just think…" Ezio started walking without letting him finish and Leonardo followed closely behind, never walking ahead, never beside. They walked in silence the whole way and the whole time Ezio couldn't suppress the feeling that he was being cruel in some way, and yet he wouldn't allow himself to act in any way more genial. Stubbornness was a bad trait to have in these situations.

They reached the building and Leonardo opened the door, standing aside to let Ezio enter first. He didn't go very far into the room and didn't take a seat. To do so could make him appear more sympathetic to what Leonardo might say than he wanted to seem.

"Would you like a drink?"  
"No."

"Something to eat maybe?"

"No."

"You can sit down if you like." Leonardo was already sitting at a table with one stool on either side of it. He motioned to the opposite stool."

"I'd rather stand."

"Okay, if you're sure…"

There was a minute of awkward quiet. Both of them had something to say, one of them had to go first. Ezio was not going to do so regardless of how much longer the silence stretched on for.

"Right, well I suppose I should start. After all I was the one that came to your house and shouted up at you. The trouble is I don't know how to start to say what needs to be said." He babbled on for a few more minutes about the awkwardness of the situation as a whole and his inability to put into words what he wanted to put across. But finally he started to try and make a point. "You have to understand, Ezio. It's nothing against you. It's just that I am romantically committed to someone else. It is true that he and I barely see each other and only really talk through letter, but that doesn't change the fact that we consider ourselves to be together. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Ezio didn't look at him. He didn't want to hear anything about this other person. As far as he was concerned they were just a nameless, faceless adversary taunting him from afar.

"And anyway, I mean you and I, we barely know each other. It's not like we have been close for a long time with this suddenly coming out of the blue. Surely you can't be so… enamoured? That you can be this upset?" There was a kind of pleading in Leonardo's voice, as if he wanted this to be true. But Ezio responded by keeping his gaze fixed at a point on the wall behind his seated desire. Now he knew he was being cruel, but Leonardo's desperation for him not to be feeling what he was feeling made it seem somehow justified. "Ezio, please say something?"

"You have no idea how I feel. I don't know why I came here. I am going now." He turned to leave; Leonardo made a start from his seat.

"No, please don't! I want to hear what you have to say! If I don't know how you feel, then why can't you tell me?"

Ezio felt his hand on his shoulder, firmly beseeching for him to stay. He stopped moving and reached up to hold him there for just a few seconds. But then he remembered what was happening. He turned round and pushed Leonardo against the wall, placing his hands on either side. A mixture of pain and anger was surging in him. He wasn't sure what to say, he wasn't even sure why he had cornered him like this. Leonardo looked scared, as if to him Ezio was an animal waiting to tear him apart. There was vulnerability in his dark eyes. Ezio didn't soften his stare even for a second. When he spoke his voice was raised, a combination of distress and aggression emanating from it.

"If it had been me. If you had not met this man, whoever he is. If it was just me. What would you have said?"

"I…I don't… I can't know…"

"TELL ME." He hadn't meant to shout, but he had no control. "Tell me the truth. Would you have rejected me then too? Or could there have been something."

He needed to know. He needed to know if this man, his first crush, his first love, could have ever been his. He needed to know whether this pain was for nothing or if there was something that might have been to justify it all. Leonardo appeared to understand why he was so wounded now. And for that reason he told the truth.

"I don't know you very well at all, Ezio. We've met only a few times and barely spoken even on those occasions. But I think, if this was another time, then I could have been very happy with you." He reached up and put his hand around Ezio's wrist as a sign of comfort. "I think this is something that could have been more than perhaps what my dreams are made of."

Ezio's body softened, his muscles unclenched. Now that he had heard this, he wasn't sure what to do. And through all the confusion inside himself at this moment, for yet another time in such a short space, he broke down and cried. He fell to the ground, curled up and cried then and there, not caring that the object of his affections was standing right there. And in response Leonardo knelt down on the floor with him and stroked his hands through his hair slowly. This action soothed him, and the tears slowly died away after a long while. They sat in silence together until it became dark outside. Ezio wrapped in Leonardo's arms for consolation. After it became apparent that he should leave, they both got up and embraced before Ezio let himself out and went on his way home. The workshop's inhabitant stood in the doorway and watched him as he walked along the deserted street.

Leonardo felt like he had made a mistake letting him go.


	7. Chapter 7

_I would have written more, blame tiredness. Expect an update either later today or tomorrow_

* * *

Ezio felt a kind of shame after opening himself up so much to Leonardo. This wasn't helped much by the fact that it felt as if going with him to have the talk that he seemed to want so desperately had not accomplished much in the way of relief. He knew Leonardo would have been willing to love him, but this did not change the fact that he didn't. Neither did this change the situation he was now in; instead of longing for what could not be, he now pined for what could have been. If anythign this felt more humiliating than the former option. At least when he thought they could never be together then he didn't shoulder any blame for the mess he found himself in emotionally.

he hadn't gone home, he had decided to go for a walk down to the docks to clear his mind instead. His family would assume that he had gone to visit Cristina or something like that.

Cristina, he had forgotten about her. He had also forgotten how pathetically he had attempted to end relations with her. He would have to fix that someday, the thought, there was no point in lying to her. She didn't deserve that without doing anything wrong. But that would have to wait; one problem at a time.

He looked at himself reflected in the water. All Ezio saw nowadays when looking at his reflection was a mess, as if what was happening in his life changed his actual appearance. It was more likely, of course that it just changed his point of view. He sighed and watched the last of the day birds flying about in the last trickle of sunlight. "Why must I torture myself so..." He was talking to no-one in particular; there was nobody visibly there apart from him. He jokingly wondered whether his avian companions could give him an answer, perhaps spell it out in feathers on the water. But there was no answer. Only silence.

He let his mind wander onto thoughts of less serious things. He thought of the lavish carnivals held each year in the Summer; he wondered when the third bridge over to the Oltarno district would be completed, he also wondered why a third bridge was even needed but he had lived in Firenze long enough to know that such matters have little to do with necessity and more to do with the money simply being available. There were gondolas docked in the water beside where he sat, they made him think of Venezia. He had never been but he had heard from his father that it is one of the most beautiful places in all of Italia. He knew there was a lot of wealth in Venezia compared to the rest of the Italian cities, certainly compared to parts of Firenze. He had heard locals complain about pickpockets in the Santa Maria Novella district, and the women often complained about husbands frequenting the San Marco district for more than just a good drink. Everyone had things to complain about in life. Money, safety, family, friendship, love; they coan not all be perfect. Not the lowest whore or the highest nobleman could have an ideal life because people always want what they can not have. Ezio had oncwe thought that he would be content forever, he now knew better.

As the moon rose higher, Ezio's thoughts came back to getting home to sleep. As much as he liked musing about the world in the dark, indulging in this just made his mind sleepier than it already was. As ashamed as he felt about exposing himself as much as he had, at least he had no more questions other than what would happen from now on. He felt the calm that comes from accepting one's own pitfalls and recognising that nothing can be done.

The streets of Firenze were as deserted as one would expect, the only people to be seen were the occasional drunk accompanied by a recently paid courtesan in their bright, revealing gowns. Ezio remembered being younger and watching them trying to sell their wares out of his window at observances had given him a kind of respect for these women so often looked down upon by the rest of society. They, like everyone else, were doing what they could to survive and feed themselves. It just so happened that what they did for money was not deemed completely respectable in richer circles, although of course this didn't stop the men from such circles helping them out every so often. The courtesans held their heads up with a kind of dignity that came from having nothing to lose and everything to gain. They worked hard, they earned their way, they payed their taxes and they lived. And the ones that were lucky, they succeeded in attaining a lifestyle that many who considered themselves more worthy would envy.

The Palazzo Auditore looked as it always did from the outside: warm, stony and peaceful. However as Ezio entered the courtyard it was obvious that something was amiss. The door was slightly ajar, the house was in complete darkness and it looked as if a couple of the windows might have been smashed. Ezio tread carefully as he went. He opened the door and listened carefully. He saw something in the corner of his eye and dodged. It was Annetta. She looked terrified. Something was definitely wrong.


	8. Chapter 8

Leonardo couldn't sleep. He had been trying for a couple of hours now but it was no , or rather someone, had gotten to him. And as much as he wanted to sink into the unconscious abyss called sleep he simply couldn't. He got out of bed, went over to the jug of water sat on the table and splashed some on his face to wake himself up more. Just because he couldn't sleep didn't mean he wasn't tired.  
Now that he'd surrendered to his mind's refusals it was now a question of what to do until he was exhausted enough to rest.

There was a painting that needed finishing. A pretty little thing of no real merit that was to be a gift to the wife of some minor nobleman, their names escaped was also a sculptural piece that he had been doing in his spare time. It was meant to be a person, but since he had no model to work from it didn't look very much like anything at the moment. But he knew exactly who he wished would model for him...

That wasn't fair. Ezio had unapologetically come storming into his life and so quickly left his mark without any care for the fact that Leonardo was meant to be living in separated monogamy. After all, even if Antonio was in Venezia it didn't mean he didn't exist anymore. But the months had not been kind and Leonardo could barely remember his face anymore. He could remember Ezio's face though.

He blamed himself. He couldn't really be annoyed at Ezio for feeling something and not knowing the repercussions. But at the same time Leonardo had done nothing to entice the young man, even if Ezio was physically impressive and extemely handsome...

There was a knock of the door. It brought Leonardo back from the fantasy he had unintentionally found himself imagining. He shook himself and walked over to the door. As he did the knocking continued. He wondered what could possibly be so urgent at this time of night.

It was Ezio. He looked absolutely terrified.

"Ezio, my friend, what's wrong?"

"Leonardo. Please, everything's wrong... I don't know why these things are happening... Can I come in?" He was out of breath.

"Yes, of course! come in and sit down. But tell me what's wrong?"

"It's... It's my father and my brothers. They've been arrested. They're being held in the Palazzo della Signoria right now. I went to see them, to find out why this has happened. My father, he wouldn't tell me. He just said to go home, retrieve some things from a chest and deliver them to the gonfaloniere. But he gave no explanation for anything!"

"But... Ezio, I'm sure this is all some mistake! I don't think your father could have done anything wrong, certainly not something that would cause him to be imprisoned so. As for your brothers, well one of them is just young isn't he? He couldn't possibly deserve this. What about your mother and sister?"

"Our maid has taken them to her sister's home to be safe until this is all figured out. I just don't understand Leonardo, why is this happening?" It was a retorical question, but Ezio looked at him with, glistening pleading eyes. Leonardo wished he could set his mind at rest, or do something to take away the desparation in his expression. He sat beside him on the bench, took Ezio's hands in his and held them tight.

"I don't know. I wish I could tell you what you want to know, but I really have no idea. I am sorry."

"I never expected you to know. It just makes no sense... The Gonfaloniere says it is a misunderstanding; that there's some sort of conspiracy against my family and that he will fix everything tomorrow. I hope he can."

"I'm sure he will. If you don't feel safe going home tonight you are welcome to stay here?"

"I would like that, thank you. I hoped I could trust you not to just throw me out."

Leonardo looked up and found himself staring directly into Ezio's eyes. Until this moment he hadn't been able to appreciate how beautiful they were. It wasn't an obvious beauty like one might expect to see when looking into the eyes of a blushing bride or a rich princess, it was far more subtle. But even through the blatant masculinity that Ezio emanated, his eyes betrayed the vulnerability he felt in times like this.

And then it happened. Ezio moved forward and in a second their lips collided. They kissed. Leonardo found himself unable to pull away as the kiss became more and more intense. He knew that he really shouldn't be doing this, but he couldn't deny his feelings anymore. The world could fall down around them for all he cared, right now he just wanted to feel Ezio here, with one hand stroking up and down his spine and the other pressing their heads together, as if to Ezio they still were not close enough, even intertwined as they were.

It was a long time before they stopped; it was Ezio that pulled away. But not in a way to suggect that something was wrong, he removed his mouth from Leonardo's slowly. Leonardo opened his eyes again and once again they were staring at each other, fingers interlaced. Leonardo smiled and Ezio reciprocated.

"It's getting very late. If you get me some blankets I'll sleep here on the bench."

"THat won't be necessary. I'm sure my beds big enough for the both of us." 


	9. Chapter 9

Ezio looked down at Leonardo as he dressed. The early morning sunlight made him look almost angelic. His pale skin and delicate features appealed to Ezio on more than just a physical level, but then again that could just be a reflection of his feelings for Leonardo. He was still sleeping. So peaceful, so happy…

He would not wake him up, with any luck he would be back in a few hours with good news, some decent wine and a kiss.

He was just so wonderful…

As Ezio donned the cloak he had found in his father's secret study the previous night, he wondered whether or not to leave a not. Leonardo would probably know where he has gone, or at least why he was not there, but he wanted to leave some sort of reassurance that he was okay, just in case he panicked for whatever reason and went looking for him. He found a scrap bit of paper and went over to a desk.

"Leonardo,

I've gone out to find out what is happening with my father and brothers. I am sorry for not waking you, but I feel so nervous about the outcome of all this. Something just does not seem right. I hope you understand, I'm sure you do.

If all is well I will probably be back soon after you read this with something to help us celebrate and calm me down. Although with you here I'm not sure I will stay too calm for long.

Last night was amazing. You made it better than I ever imagined. I hope I didn't disappoint you.

Thank you for your hospitality. And your love.

Ezio."

The words flowed out of him easily, perhaps because he wasn't confessing anything or perhaps because he subconsciously was desperate to just get going. He placed the paper on the table beside Leonardo's bed and hoped that he would notice it on top of all the other papers that seemed to be stacked on every surface. It was obvious how intelligent as well as artistic the man was that Ezio couldn't understand anything that was written down on any of the parchments he had casually peered at.

Ezio sat on the bed gently and again looked down at his lover. He slowly turned from facing the ceiling to towards Ezio. He didn't want Leonardo to wake up because he didn't want to have to say goodbye. There was no reason for Ezio to think that he wouldn't be back soon enough, but he was scared that he might not. There wasn't much he wasn't scared of in this moment. Now more than any other time in his life he had so much to lose, and little chance of not losing it. So much to lose…

A few locks of dirty blond hair fell onto Leonardo's face and slowly, tenderly Ezio moved them away. At his touch Leonardo moved, causing Ezio's hand to stroke his cheek. His skin was soft, like snow. A smile appeared on his mouth and Ezio felt a stinging in his eyes he wished would go away. He would not cry, he had no reason to cry over Leonardo anymore. He was his now, he didn't have to ache anymore. All he wanted was for this moment not to go away, not to end. He just wanted to exist in this until the very end.

But he had pressing matters to attend to. And no matter how much he didn't want to leave he knew that his family could still be in prison, or worse. He felt so selfish for wanting to just sit here with his sweetheart while his father and brothers were out there waiting. He got up and, being careful not to make too much noise, slowly opened the door and left. He pulled the white cloak over his head and walked into the trickle of people already beginning to flood the streets.

* * *

Leonardo awoke slowly, as if from a dream. But it had not been a dream. He had spent last night with Ezio Auditore, a young man capable of unexpected levels of love and a man of, at least to Leonardo's eyes, impressive physical stature that was very agreeable to the eye.

He turned around on the bed and, without opening his eyes, held out a hand from beneath the covers, expecting to come into contact with some part of Ezio's body. Which part he didn't care, all were equally as pleasing. But he did not, he felt the cold stone of the wall and not the warm skin he had expected. Slowly he looked, allowing his eyes to adjust to the light coming in from behind the drapes. Nobody was in the bed with him; he turned back around to check the rest of the room but could see the attractive silhouette he had hoped for. He was alone, and at this thought his good spirits were disappointingly lowered. Perhaps Ezio had not enjoyed himself as much last night as he had hoped.

He sat up on the bed, the shock the chill of the stone floor on his feet waking him further. It was surprisingly cold today, and with nothing to shield his skin except a few thin blankets he felt this quite badly.

He knew exactly what he wanted to protect him from the cold…

Leonardo shook his head; such impure thoughts were, although fun, pointless when his lover was off in the great unknown of Firenze somewhere doing God knows what.

He noticed a scrap of paper on his bedside table that did not belong there. Although Leonardo's room always looked like it was in constant disarray it was, to his mind, an orderly mess in which he always knew where everything was. He picked the paper up and checked to see what it was and where it was meant to be.

Even in his sleepish daze he recognised the untidy scrawl immediately. He read it quickly and began to feel very guilty for not remembering the reason why Ezio had turned up at his door last night so distraught. Of course he was away finding out the fate of his family, for him to be anywhere else was unthinkable when they could very easily be in danger. There was an unspoken nervousness in what he had written and, even if he had tried to remain cheerful, Leonardo was sure that Ezio was probably terrified. If not for his family then at least for himself, for the city guards were looking for him as well last night, and a hood could only conceal someone for so long, especially when it was such a conspicuous shade of gleaming white.

Now Leonardo was worried. The idea of Ezio being locked up when they were just beginning their relationship distressed him greatly. He decided that he would throw himself into his work as a distraction, and try to forget that somewhere out there Ezio could be running scared for his life or worse. He got up and began to dress, there was a painting that had been commissioned by some noble family that needed finishing and he had been meaning to visit one of the dottore with a view of learning more on anatomy. Art and science: his two greatest passions, they would no doubt prove a useful diversion for his mind today, even if he could not distract his heart.

* * *

Molto dispiace for my absence, sometimes I need prodding to write and I haven't been well lately either. Hopefully you enjoy this, I really hope you do. Feedback would be greatly appreciated, or even a "hello, how are you?" It gets lonely writing all alone at 4 AM. But I'm sure if you're on here you know that...


	10. Chapter 10

It was now the evening, the sun was beginning to set over the city walls in the west, and Leonardo was beside himself with worry. He could see no reason for Ezio to be taking so long to return that didn't end with him being in a jail cell or worse. He prayed that this was not the case; at least if he was in a cell then Leonardo could make a feeble attempt to bribe a guard or break him out…

All day he had been stealing glances at the street outside, or making excuses to himself that caused him to go outside. He never strayed far from the door for fear of missing him. If things had indeed gone badly today for some reason then Ezio would need someone to comfort him, unless he had already gone somewhere with his family without saying goodbye.

"He wouldn't leave without saying goodbye." Leonardo said to himself. He was standing by his desk, clinging to the sides of the tale to hold in the tears that his fears wanted him to cry.

There was a knock at the door. A rapid, urgent banging like a criminal seeking sanctuary within holy walls. Through the glass Leonardo could make out a tall silhouette that was already familiar to him. He quickly shook himself, trying to regain his composure and went to the door as the thumping continued. He daren't breathe relief for fear of the news that may come, for he knew enough about the corruption in the legal and political systems of Firenze to be aware that being alive and not imprisoned was still not the same as being free or safe.

As soon as he opened the door Ezio threw himself onto the man in the doorway. He clung to his lover in a way that did not indicate romance or affection; it was clearly to Leonardo from the tight, desperate hold Ezio had on him that something very, very bad had just occurred.

But he did not ask for information, he did not speak; he didn't make a single noise. He just backed up enough to allow the door to close and then returned the embrace as much as he could without restricting Ezio's breathing. Leonardo himself was finding it a little difficult to breathe in, but to just give this young man a little security he was more than willing to feel light-headed for a while.

Ezio was not crying, but he was breathing heavily as if he had run for miles. Leonardo slackened his grip and changed to rubbing Ezio's back with his arms still in a gentle hug. After a few minutes he seemed to calm down, inhaling deeper and slower, but still he would not let go. It was almost as if he was afraid that if he let go then he would disappear, Leonardo thought.

This was precisely how Ezio felt. For in just a few minutes he had lost three people he had never believed he could live without. His father and brothers were all dead, and there was nothing that Ezio could do about this. He kept replaying the scene in his head and asking questions. What if he had arrived just a little sooner? What if he had never given those documents to the gonfaloniere? What if he'd done as told a little sooner yesterday when they were arrested? He could have put up more of a fight, he could have helped, he could have done more than just stand there as they hung from a rope.

Ezio had been running and trying to hide for what seemed like hours, and the only place he could think of that could be safe was here with Leonardo. He felt almost like a child running to its mother, Leonardo would make him safe, Leonardo would make it all better. Even though he knew that not even Leonardo had a way to pierce the veil into the afterlife, just having someone to cling, and someone to hold him tight, made the realm outside seem a little further away, and right now he just wanted to the rest of the world to disappear and let him rest in sweet darkness, let him forget everything.

"Ezio… Maybe you should lie down. Come to my room, I'll get you a drink."

He couldn't take in what Leonardo was saying; he just let himself be led to a bed and lain down. Although he could see Leonardo, and hear when he spoke, he only seemed to be truly real when he could feel him. It was as if the trauma of the day's events caused all but one of his senses to shut down, or else that his mind was refusing to take in all but the most essential information for fear of something happening that could make him break down further. Ezio wasn't sure he could break any further at this moment.

As Leonardo got up to get some water, Ezio still clung to his hand, not protesting his actions but still refusing to let him go. If he let Leonardo go then he'd be like everyone else, just a passing blur in the panicked blur of grief in Ezio's mind.

"Ezio, please, let me get you something to drink. You look exhausted. Please, just rest. I'll be back in just a moment. I promise." As he said this he squeezed Ezio's hand, as if given a physical confirmation to the words he was saying. And Ezio loosened his grip, letting Leonardo remove his hand from being held. But rather than just leaving, Leonardo sat back down next to him and lifted his head from the pillow. He pulled Ezio towards him and untied the bow of ribbon keeping his hair back in that small ponytail. He then slowly placed him back down and stroked Ezio's cheek for a whole, softly and slowly. As he did this Ezio felt again for a hand to hold. When he found one he opened his mouth and in a hoarse voice began to speak.

"They're dead. All three of them are dead. My father, Federico and Petruccio. Even Petruccio, he was only thirteen years old. What the hell could he have done wrong, he barely ever left his bed…"

Leonardo felt a strange kind of sympathy for Ezio. He had never lost anyone so close to him like this, so he had no way of knowing the pain he was going through right now. It was hard to know how to help someone when you've no idea what they're going through.

Ezio's eyes were swimming with tears. He wasn't crying, not properly. He was quietly whimpering like a lost puppy, as if he could only let his sadness out bit by bit. He turned onto his side so that the hand Leonardo had been stroking his face with was between his head and the bed. Every so often Leonardo felt a drop land on his wrist and with every tear he himself came closer to crying.

"Oh, Ezio…" It was all he could think to say. Every time he tried to form a string of words to comfort him they disappeared, for they never seemed to be enough. For what do you say to someone whose world is falling down around him? He abandoned thoughts of going to get anything; instead he kicked his shoes off and curled up on the bed with his lover. Ezio faced the far away wall and Leonardo faced Ezio, pushing his arm through under him so that he could pull him closer. He felt Ezio hold his arms as he wrapped them around Ezio's waist. Everything was silent except for their breathing. It was, Leonardo thought, a strange thing that they had been in a similar situation the night before, except then the energy had been heavy and hot, whereas now things could not be more different. Ezio was fragile and so hurt, and Leonardo was going to protect him from anything else that could cause him any more pain. Nobody was going to harm his Ezio, not without paying a most dear price.

"Ezio… I wish I could take you from this hell and let you forget how sadness feels. I'm sorry that I can't."

* * *

Well... we all knew it was going to happen. This was difficult to write. I really hope I got this write. Expect more sooner than my previous updates have been, because I've got no plans of ending this any time soon.


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